Discomfort Leads to Growth
As I write this I am deep in the trenches of discomfort. I am less than a month into my stay in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil; I came here for a work-exchange that fell through and I then found myself sharing a room with 6 people in a hostel with no real plan B. Lacking direction, structure, and friends (within a few thousand miles), and unable to understand Portuguese (being fluent in Spanish is not as helpful as I had imagined it to be), panic, anxiety and self-doubt have become daily companions of mine. This hodgepodge of feelings reminds me of how I have felt other times that I have stepped far outside of my comfort zone in order to make a major life change: when I left home for the first time to go to university, when I moved to California, then Spain, when I started Multidimensional Health LLC.
Reflecting upon these other events in my life, the trend emerges; every time I have shaken myself to the core by removing myself from my comfort zone in order to do something daunting, I have come out stronger, with greater self-knowledge, and in a better situation than I ever could have dreamt for myself beforehand. Upon reflection I notice that without exception, living through (and sometimes embracing) the uncomfortable, unpleasant feelings that accompany change has always led me to grow, to trust myself more, and to become better connected with my intuition. Being connected to my intuition allows me to better heal and care for myself, and thus to help others heal and care for themselves. Ultimately, tolerating discomfort helps me to fulfill my dharma.
Discomfort and danger can often go hand-in-hand, so a natural response to the feeling of discomfort is to feel that you are in danger. Discomfort, however, does not always equal danger. If the situation we find ourselves in is uncomfortable, but not dangerous, we have the option to observe ourselves and hence deepen our self-understanding. In the moments when I am able to turn off “panic-mode” and be inquisitive about the situation, I learn quite a lot. I might ask myself why I am choosing to be here, deep in the discomfort, when I could be back in Valencia or Boston in the company of my friends and family. Why is the self-doubt part of me feeling so triggered by this particular circumstance, and what does that tell me? Sometimes these questions sometimes lead me to answers; sometimes they serve to make the discomfort no less uncomfortable, yet more tolerable, because I find the purpose in it. If truly being present with the discomfort will ultimately help me to be a better human, then I feel that it is worth it.
We have a choice to embrace discomfort, or to run from it. We can have the hard conversation with a loved one, or we can let the resentment build and damage the relationship. We can spend our free time searching for a new job, or we can stay comfortable in our misery. We can make small-but-daunting changes to our diet in the interest of our health, or we can turn a blind eye and hope the consequences don’t catch up with us. What stands between us and the feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction in life can be making hard decisions; decisions to willingly make ourselves uncomfortable temporarily in the interest of long-term gain.
As uncomfortable as I am in the meantime, I trust that on the other side of this discomfort will be tremendous growth and satisfaction. (Most) plants only grow after having been rained on. Humans are no different.
·For further reading on dharma see The Great Work of Your Life by Stephen Cope